Tucker Max Stories

Hmmm não sei como fui parar a um site curioso: the Tucker Max Stories...

Deixo aqui um exemplo dos "contos tradicionais" deste übersexuel:



Girl licks ass, pretends it didn't happen

Last night I met a girl out. She was really cute, and had emailed me because she wanted to "do my laundry." I guess she decided the best way to accomplish this was to meet me out at a bar.

Anyway, after about 2-3 hours of drinking she finally got up the courage to admit to herself why she was out with me, and we went back to my place to fuck.

We make out at the front door for about a minute or two, drunkenly stumble in, throw clothes everywhere, and she pushes me on the bed, gives me one more peck on the lips, then goes down on me...skipping past my penis, and totally ignoring the balls...and starts feasting on my butt buffet. Seriously, I don't think a colonic would have cleaned my ass any better than her tongue did. I am not complaining, she was a fucking expert, jacking me off at the same time and working her tongue around like a lesbian porn star. Of course, all I could think about was how many guys she's done this to before if she's so eager to do it to me, but whatever.

This morning, I roll her over for morning sex, and when we are done, I jokingly call her "poop lips." She doesn't understand why.

Tucker "Uhhhhhh...are you the same girl as last night?"
Poop lips "Please die. Of course I am the same girl, DUH!"
Tucker "Do you not remember licking my ass like it was a Tootsie Pop?"
Poop lips "OH MY GOD I DID NOT!"

Of course you didn't. After all, if you "don't remember" it, than it didn't happen, right?

Lovely... ;)